This could be attributed to a number of reasons, therefore could please post the configuration of your outgoing DP.
From your description you mention that you see the call hit the gateway, by this do you mean you see the outgoing SETUP message? If this is the case when do you see the incoming CALL_PROCEEDING message and ALERTING? What is the time difference between these messages.
If you are using overlap sending then you need to be cautious of how explicit your DP are configured for example you will want to avoid using 9T due to interdigit timeout, try to be more explicit.
Please post your DP config and a 'debug isdn q931'.
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